It's hard to imagine being okay with putting yourself in harm's way. But what's the alternative? Never putting yourself in the way of anything? The only way to ever avoid being hurt is to close yourself off to any experience at all. I don't know that I want to be the kind of person who never experiences anything just because I'm scared.
I have trust issues. I have trouble trusting that people will do what they say they will do. This stems from a lot of things, not the least of them my previous marriage. But that lack of trust has bled into every area of my life, including academics.
I have had a hard time trusting that I'll be able to learn from my instructors. I believe that most of them know what they are doing. But I have trouble trusting that I'll be able to glean what I need to from them.
This class has been an exercise in trust. Trusting my instructor. Trusting myself that I can learn the material. That I can perform the tasks. That I can freaking LET GO of my need to control the outcome. Trusting that the universe knows what to give me and when.
Maybe I'm learning to trust? Can watercolor teach you that?